Macy's batch I could have done without.

Mario Bello has officially replaced Laura Linney as The Most Unappealing Actress In The World Ever with her performance in The Cooler.

The movie itself isn't awful: William H. Macy plays a guy who's luck is so phenomenally bad, he's hired by Alec Baldwin to hang around his casino so that some of that bad luck rubs off on the patrons. Until Macy falls in love -- rather, until he "gets lucky" with cocktail waitress Natalie, played by Bello, and his luck takes a turn for the better.

Sounded promising, and it started out that way. But the more Maria Bello was onscreen, the less I cared. Her character hit every note on the cliche scale: working girl, do anything for money, gave baby up for adoption, etc. Oh, and of course she's into astrology. (Who'da thunk it?) When Baldwin stormed into her hotel room about 3/4 of the way through the movie, I wanted so badly for him to kill her (which, in truth, would have been a great turn for the story). But no. Sadly, no.

Even though the role was poorly written -- indeed, ill-conceived -- I reckon it would have been tolerable had someone else been cast. I've never been impressed by Bello (Permanent Midnight, Payback, Secret Window), but I've never actively disliked her until now.

We rated it 2 stars out of 5, but we'd watched something called Pretty When You Cry just before -- and the less said about that one, the better -- so we graded on a curve. Too bad, too, because although Macy was pretty much what you expect from him these days, Baldwin was enthralling. Though, now that I think about it, he was really just playing an extension of his character from Glengarry Glen Ross. But how bad can that be?